wishes.

i wish.
i could have done some things differently.
i wish i could go back several years, and spend a ton of time with my mom.
once the doctors told us she was terminal, and had about 30 days, i wish i would have stopped working completely and been there with her everyday and night.
i wish i had more pictures of my mom. even a good video would be nice.
i wish that i could have had a 'real conversation' with her just one last time. to tell her just how much i loved her. (she was on too many drugs to know what was really going on)
i wish that she could have met her grand-daughter, kiara.
i wish that cancer did not take my mom from me. she should have lived a much longer life.
and i wish that time would make all this easier. but it doesn't.